Not an example

I’m not an example,
Nor a ladder to be climbed,
I’m not one in a tiny sample,
Or a case study to be mined.

My mother asks me what I want to do,
My father, silently, wonders that too,
I tell the truth - “I wish I knew,”
And then I lie - “But! But! My business grew!”
I ice the cake - “starting up is hard,”
I feel so fake - my scowl and bluster my guard.

I don’t tell them the real truth,
I scarcely know it myself.
I feel the pull, the tug of the road,
First I want to walk the north,
And then the south,
And now the east,
And then the West,
And talk to a myriad people to ask,
What’s behind that smile, that mask?
I want to forget who I am,
I want to have a billion friends,
And never feel alone again.